2016: YEAR OF MATURITY

Assalamualaikum. :)

Pejam celik pejam celik dah masuk 2017 and it took me 2 days later to blog something or everything about 2016! ^^'

2016. Hmmmm?
Sigh.


From chapter 1 till 365, macam-macam berlaku! And all I can say is that 2016 was a year of maturity for me. Dalam manisnya senyuman terselit kesedihan. Dalam riangnya ketawa terselit kemurungan.

There's a blessings in disguise. I know I cannot demand for happiness without a lil bit of losing someone. But, we are human. We are greedy for love, happiness, wealth and the list goes on.

I lost my dearest Guru Besar in 27 June 2016. I wanted to learn more about life from her but I know that everything will come to end. This life is temporary. The last thing she said before she died (10 days before she passed away), "Cikgu tak sabar nak buat reunion dengan alumni cikgu-cikgu and students SKAM. Boleh la kita sembang lama masa reunion alumni tu nanti". Kenapa cikgu pergi terlalu awal? Hmmm.. Semoga cikgu ditempatkan dalam golongan hamba Allah swt yang dijanjikan syurga in shaa allah. I will always remember you no matter where I go or where will I be.

My list of friends also getting smaller. I realized that one-sided love will never enough and saying "I love you" merely is not enough. There should be action to prove that you really really love that person. I did all that I can to love her. To be with her. Making an effort to see her. To spend my time with her. To keep this friendship as beautiful as it should be. But, sometimes, what I did was never enough. It's effortless. Love can be a weakness sometimes.

Sometimes, she is just another chapter of reminding me that to love someone is to lose someone. You are amazing just the way you are. I know that someday, we pass each other as perfect strangers. When that moment come, I thank you for breaking my heart into pieces, for betraying my trust and loyalty. Remember, you can't break what's already broken. I know you will find someone better than me. Someone who can make jokes and make you smile and laugh. I know you still love me. Thanks for everything. Whenever I miss you, I will revisit our chapter.

Revisiting your past is good if you can learn something from the past for a better future. Revisiting the past gives us the courage to move on.

Tahun 2016 ni juga tahun penuh dengan kerja gila! Hahaha! Husna even said to me, "Aku rasa tahun 2016 ni banyak kali juga hang naik Kulim. Rasanya hang lagi kerap balik Kulim dari aku!" hahahaha!

What can I dooooooooo~~~ Kulim and KL bukannya jauh mana pun. Dalam 3 jam lebih je pun! kehkehkeh! The only place I love to be when I'm in Kulim is standing next to my Papa's kubur. Rasa tenang setiap kali pandang batu nisan tu... Rasa sayu.... Rasa sedih.... Rasa dekat sangat ngan Papa... Hmmmm... :(

And then... There's MIA. The guy who loves me so dearly and I thank Allah swt for that. Semoga segala urusan antara kita dipermudahkan meskipun kadangkala kita diuji dengan ujian kesetiaan dan perasaan cemburu. :) Kalau ada jodoh, in shaa allah everything goes well. Semoga Allah swt jaga hati kita berdua agar kita tak terlalu leka bercinta sehingga lupa pada cinta Yang Maha Esa. :)

Dont you worry sayang, I only have eyes on you and this heart keeps on loving you. There's a hundreds (or probably millions) of men out there, but none that can catch my heart the way you do! I fell in love with you and I will always try to be the better person. May our love becomes stronger each day! And I thank Allah swt for giving me the chance to fall in love with you and to be loved by you! And I pray to Allah swt that our relationship remains till the day we are finally married and living this blessed life as husband and wife. Doakan yang terbaik untuk kita berdua. In shaa allah. <3

Bila dah umur 20an ni, dah takmau dah fikir cinta yang sementara. Takmau dah fikir perkara-perkara remeh. Takmau dah layan perangai entah apa-apa manusia sekeliling. Nak fikir how to be an adult! Life is so damn challenging! And we become stronger only if we face our weaknesses!

All I can say to myself is that you did great throughout 2016! Keep the head up and march forward because things will only get tougher.!

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim... Semoga perjalanan hidup sepanjang tahun 2017 dipermudahkan! In shaa allah! Hey 2017, be nice and let's create beautiful memories together! :)